Update #1

I have received some very disturbing letters from Brody lately. At first, I thought he was just going insane, but it turns out, he was trying to send me a message. None of his letters made sense. He was use incorrect grammar and spell things wrong. He would even reference events that would never happen. It took weeks, but I finally deciphered the message. All it said was, "They ran out of gravy, please get me out of here." With that, I am off to save my crazy buddy!

How are you? It's been a while...

It has been a long while since the last update, and let me just say from the bottom of our hearts, we're sorry. Anyway, as you probably know, SUE has officially been destroyed, you know, even more than last time, and Brody had to be admitted into an earth insane asylum due to the immense grief he felt over the loss of his gopher army. I am sorry to say that you will probably not hear much from Brody as he has been forbidden from using technology due to the incident involving various youtube personas. I hope to keep you readers informed on Brody's progress but no promises...

 Rest in Pieces, Gopher Army, rest in pieces...

100th Post!

Welcome to the 100th post, also, sorry to all those people who would have preferred Brody to write this post, but he is too lazy. Seriously, I gave him days and he did not write it, so here it is! Happy 100! Anyway, SUE has never been better... Okay, I am lying, our ship was sucked into a black hole created by two neutron stars deeply in love...



*Update: This post is a bit late... I don't know why I never published this...

Update

It has been quite a while since the last post. Sadly, nothing noteworthy has happened... Wait! Brody did form a new intergalactic empire, but it was quickly overthrown by his genetically enhanced gophers. I told him never to trust a gopher, but he never listens, and now he can't listen because the gophers tore his ears off! Anyway, I hope all of you at home haven't been too broken up at the lack of effort to keep a blog going on our part. (Like any of you read these posts anyway). I will try to keep a better tab on the blog in the future, hopefully Brody will too, but at the moment he is recovering from emergency surgery, you know, because of the gopher attack.

How to Pirate and get Caught! In Five Easy Steps!

First step- Find good illegal material.
Second- Make sure you disable all proxies and keep all of your internet cookies with the cloud.
Third- Start the torrent, I can't really help you out here.
Fourth- Go tell your mom and if you don't have one download one.
Fifth- Tell the police what you have done and ask Allah for forgiveness.

Welcome to the Internet; I will be your Guide

If this is your first encounter with the internet, let me be the first, and only, person to say, I am sorry. Seriously, though, no one deserves this. Anyway, the therapy seems to be working. Maybe. I'm not so confused all the time, like I was. I do still have moments where I black out completely and end up in a different dimension, though. Well, it is good to be back, so, bye, I guess...

Report of Progress

Every few months, SuperNovaEmpire contacts all of the screw-ups of the empire and request a "Report of Progress", you know, to make sure they haven't gotten themselves killed in an extremely horrible way. Anyway, I have never been on the list of screw-ups, but now I am. I guess because I am partly responsible for the Gerbil Apocalypse of 2058, which you are not allowed to know about, yet. Anyway, because my report was, quote, "illegible and written in crayon", I am now required to go to therapy. I will be keeping everyone updated on my adventures.

Wee! Therapy is fun!